An open letter to all the TG couples infatuated with the concept of PDA:

I can’t think of a better way to start my morning than walking through the TG parking lot to see car after car filled with happy couples exchanging good morning lip locks.

As if the strenuous hike up the front stairs isn’t joyous enough, there is something so riveting and pleasant about having the front door slammed in my face because two lovers feel hand holding is more important than common courtesy.

It’s always fantastic to have my barely digested breakfast be gagged up because snogging is seen as a priority in the hallways.

One of my personal favorites is having to forcefully tear apart couples in deep embraces in an attempt to get to my locker.

It’s so precious when you are trying to leave class but a super caring and not at all clingy boyfriend demands to walk his girlfriend to class and blocks you from exiting the classroom.

And from my expression you would think it was Christmas morning when the school day is over and the flocks of couples look like departing soldiers who won’t see their significant other for months, but in reality they will snapchat them within minutes of leaving school in order to keep their snap streak alive.

And it satisfies and enhances everyone else’s educational experience to get to witness your puppy love in the making so much that I think it it would be beneficial to all for this to continue and perhaps have it increase.

Your reasoning behind your immense infatuation in public may be because this is the only time you see each other during the week, but does it not make you even a little bit uncomfortable to have your math teacher seeing you suck face in the hallway?

Young love folks. Isn’t it precious?

Yours Truly,

Anne Thompson “A Mortified Student”